Give Yourself Time

Do you feel like you're caught in the trap of busyness but not moving forward?

Perhaps there's an invitation to step back and sit with yourself.

It's a small gift that can take 30 seconds to hours. You're the one that determines how much you're willing to give yourself.

That gift is time.

Oh, time - that old friend that we've journeyed with for many incarnations, calling us to sit with it in the present moment as it slips away to become the past. She's (and I call time 'she' for a reason) one with our nature, an aspect of our essence as we live the multi-dimensional awareness of all time happening now.

Time has been a gift I've given myself recently when I realized that every part of my body, mind, and Spirit didn't want to create, push or offer anything. I couldn't. Something was stopping me.

I thought at first it was procrastination that was being fed by a lack of motivation. I was internally beating myself up for not following my timeline, but something in me was anchored to the port and couldn't get the ship going.

I felt like I was cracking, trying to seal the cracks with imaginary super glue coated in positive words and thoughts, but something was coming through that I couldn't identify.

My Lightbody felt like it was bursting from the inside out, telling me the old ways were falling away and that fears and constriction no longer fit.

Something was being catalyzed as the pressure was building.

I thought a vacation would help, but it only cracked me open even more.

So I did the one thing that I never do, which was to sit with it, and oooooh, that was a hard one.

I watched old memories surfacing, filling me with guilt, remorse, and regret. I thought I had played that karmic energy out. But I guess I was wrong.

The Universe was telling me there was more releasing that had to take place. So I kept repeating the words of Ho'oponpono: I'm sorry. Please forgive me. I love you and thank you.

At first, I thought I was saying this to my Higher Self and Source, but then I began to get glimpses of my wounded inner child. As I said these words, whether silently, in a whisper, or out loud, she began to get stronger, sitting up, standing, and finally growing.

But these glimpses… they're fleeting.

They're short instances that my Guides and Soul Council show me that I'm on the right track and assimilating what's coming through for release rather than hiding, refusing to acknowledge, or feeling too busy to deal with it.

In April, I gave myself the gift of time.

I sat with each memory and thought that came up, letting my body feel the emotions, good or bad until I felt nothing and came to neutral.

I sat with my inner judgments and criticisms until they were no longer so loud but barely audible until they blended with the silence.

I sat with the space of my schedule, embracing moments of sessions with clients and time off work where I could sit outside in peace or walk through the woods in wonder.

I sat with the energy of my garden, witnessing new growth and being present with the plant's sentience.

I sat with myself and asked, "What would you like to feel at this present moment?"

The gift of time is something I invite you to experience for yourself lovingly this month.

See where you may be caught in the trance of 'doing' - very masculine energy. Then, pause in the void of the moment - very feminine energy - and sit with time.

You may find there's space that's growing within. This space invites you to fill it in with new experiences, thoughts, and feelings.  

You are essentially giving yourself an internal space clearing, which can yield such lovely results.

You may feel a sense of spaciousness, agelessness, and potency at the moment.

You may feel a buoyed lift of support from The Universe, letting you know that "You're Okay!"

You may feel a deep sense of gratitude for all you have and are blessed with.

You may even grasp the energy of hope that lifts you to a higher state of being.

You may realize that you like yourself and that there's nothing else you need to do to accept where you're at.

It all comes in time. Spirit's time.

We're just along for the ride.

So take a deep breath and exhale, my friend, May is a new month, and we've got a Mercury in Retrograde season ahead (May 11- June 2, 2022). So give yourself that little extra space of time, and you'll be able to handle any challenges, obstacles, or trials that come your way.

After all, this is your reminder that you're exactly in the right place at the right time right now.